Book Club ~ Feminine Appeal

Book - Feminine Appeal by Carolyn Mahaney

Buy Online ($6-$12)

We are so excited to be offering this online Book Club for moms who have a desire to be the mom that God has designed us to be. This is going to be a 9 week Book Review. We will start with a chapter a week and I have two other moms that are going to blog through this journey with me. We are wanting everyone to use this blog to comment on each week so we can all learn from each other what God did in your hearts and see how he can transform us all right where he has us! With this platform it will allow anyone to take this journey whenever they want and all the comments will be there. How awesome!

"Feminine Appeal will help Christian women recover the nearly lost treasure of God's way of thinking and living"

Three years ago we used this book in a bible study for moms and since then all of us have remembered it so well and gone back to this book we felt this would be the best one to start with. We pray that you find the same thing!

Every week we will start with a worship song and hope you enjoy them.

Week 1 ~ Transformed by Titus 2

pg. 18 ~ "Why isn't this satisfying? Why do I feel so overwhelmed" Boy did this stick out to me! In the daily race of life in the shoes of this mom, I do feel so overwhelmed with tasks to be the best that I can be. A couple of years ago I was in a prayer circle and I said, "How can Jesus feed thousands and I can barely feed 3 people." This was the moment that I realized that I needed help from a mentor with little things as well as big. I was a new mom of two and I had not been meal planning. This was something that has helped bring peace to my home at the meal time of each day.

Titus 2:3-5
"Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanders or slaves to wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled."

Ok - so I can use some of all this. So I urge you all to look for an older believer in your lives to see if you can meet them for coffee. This does not have to be a formal planned thing, some of the women I have asked for coffee have no idea why. But in the end the Lord will bless you because you are following his instructions for yourself and this older woman. Start praying today for God to put someone in your path.

pg 28 ~ "Consider the loveliness of a woman who passionately adores her husband, who tenderly cherishes her children, who creates a warm and peaceful home, who exemplifies purity, self control, and kindness in her character and who gladly submits to her husband's leadership-for all the days God grants her life. I dare say there are few things that display the gospel jewel with greater elegance. This is true feminine appeal."

Application Question~ "Who are unbelievers (friends, neighbors, family) watching your life? How do you think you can make the gospel attractive by modeling these virtues?

Week 2 ~ The Delight of Loving My Husband

pg 36
"God will renew your strength so that you will not grow weary in cultivating a tender love for your husband."

I have been married for over 11 years. I am blessed with two young boys that I care take everyday. I often have to remember the order that the Lord designed.
1-God
2-Husband
3-Children
With so much time spent taking care of my children and the house it is so easy to get this order mixed up. Through the years I have found that I tend to use my husband as a sounding board for everything that goes wrong in my life. This is why God designed this order because he wants us to bring these things to him to take care of. Our husbands are the heads of the house and if they are at work all day dealing with other cares, it is our job as wives to make the evening a peaceful and enjoying one for them. I see such a difference in our evenings when I spend time with the Lord and then invest in my relationship with my husband.

pg 39
"When we see our husbands as sinners like ourselves-sinners in need of God's grace and mercy-it strips away any intolerant, critical, or demanding attitude we may be tempted to have. Every husband has areas where he needs to change and grow, but so do we!"

pg 42
"If we have forgotten the things that first attracted us to our husbands, lets change our thought pattern and start to remember them."
While reading this chapter that night my husband and I went back in our minds to when we first met and started remembering all the fun moments and memories and it was the best conversation we had in a long time. It was not about kids, events, or family. Just me and him! I want one of my new goals for this year to be to get involved in my husband and invest more in our relationship. The more I do this the more I will reap what God has for me in this marraige.

Comment Question~
What is one way that we can change our thought pattern?

Week 3 ~ The Blessings of Loving My Children

pg 52
"No job on earth takes more physical, mental, social, emotional, and spiritual strength than being a good wife and mother."

After spending 10 years in the corporate world and working 10 hour days, I realized that nothing compares to caring so much about two little boys that everything matters. No matter if it is what they are eating, how they are playing with others, or how long they sleep at nap. It all means so much and it takes an emotional toll on a mom. This is why I know I need to look to God to help me get through my days and I am only going to be happy when I know that I am pleasing him in all these tiny activities and serving him. What a treasure that he trusts me so much with two of his children.

pg 54
"Now if Jesus needed to withdraw frequently and pray in order to receive His Father's help and strength, do we suppose we need such times any less? So if you are weary, or if your joy and vision for motherhood is waning, take some time this week to be alone with God."
Find something you can do by yourself and focus on what God has for you. I love to run so once a week I do a prayer run and just talk to God the whole time and at the end I am always shocked at what I learned in 30 minutes of quiet time with him!

Psalm 127 "Behold, children are heritage from the Lord, fruit of the womb a reward."
pg 36
"I had been viewing this baby as "a forty hour work week". But God wanted me to think of him as a reward."
2 Cor. 12:9 "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness"

How important for us to memorize this verse and when we experience a moment of weakness to know that his power can be made perfect in this moment of weakness. What a new way of life knowing that this journey of motherhood was not meant to be done alone!

Comment Question
When was the last time you took extended time by yourself to meet with God and receive refreshment through prayer and His Word? Can we all give some fun ideas of how to create time in our week to do this. Is there a friend or family member that could help you get this?

Week 4 ~ The Safety of Self Control

Proverbs 25:28 "A man without self control is like a city broken into and without walls."
pg 67
"He wants to encirlce us with a wall that can withstand the onslaughts on all three fronts. This wall is self control."

This is an ongoing struggle in the daily life of a mother. We are juggling so many activities and caring for so many people that often when we do not take care of ourselves we will loose our self control.

"Sin delivers negative consequences not only in our own lives, but also in our relationships with others."

It took me a couple of outbursts to realize that the consequences of this action was on my children and husband. I know that many times I want to hide in the closet and scream, but these are in the exact moments of weakness where God will show me his strength to get through these situations.

2Cor. 10:5 "take every thought captive to obey Christ."

Matthew 6:25-27 "There is always enough time to do what God has called me to do."
2 Cor. 12:9 "God's grace is sufficient"
1 Peter 5:7 "He does care."

pg 79
"So you see, self control cannot be achieved "all by ourselves." We develop this virtue only through his "better strength."

Comment Question
Give an example where you "listened to yourself" instead of "talked to yourself." What biblical thoughts should you have been speaking to your soul?

Week 5 ~ The Pleasure of Purity

Colossians 3: 1-5 "If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your mind on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you will also appear with him in glory. Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry."

When I was involved in a prayer circle last year we focused on Purity in our daily lives. I am an avid reader and God showed me that I was idolizing the relationships in romance novels. This was setting unrealistic expectations on my marriage. Once I realized this God gave me a new joy in the love relationship that I do have with my husband and not an unrealistic one I was lusting after in my novels. Imagine that:)

pg 90
"Observe David's commitment in Psalm 101:2-3 "I will walk in my house with a blameless heart. I will set before my eyes no vile thing."

pg 97
"The bed is the heart of the home, the arena of love, the seedbed of life, and the one constant point of meeting."

Fun Stuff
Recount the love story of you and your husband. Remember reasons why you fell in love with him and try to daily see those things through the business of life.

Week 6 ~ The Honor of Working at Home

pg 104
"The Proverbs 31 woman is one such model. During her life time she pursued many endeavors beyond the confines of her house. She worked among the poor and needy, she traveled, she bought real estate and planted vineyards, she made linen garments and sashes and sold them, she participated in trading - but her primary motive and goal with all these enterprises was to serve her family and home. This woman's attentiveness to her home is God's standard for our conduct. Working at home must always remain a constant and ongoing priority in our lives."

This is a struggle in the world today. It seems that a lot of the business that is in our lives is outside of our home. The more things that we are involved in we need to ask these questions that she lists on page 105.
"Will it enhance and enrich the lives of my family? Does this endeavor hinder my role as a caretaker of my home?"
pg 106
"The Lord is my strength and my shield, in him my heart trusts, and I am helped." God is the one who has called you to be a homemaker, and He will supply all the strength you need as you look to Him."
pg 109
"We are to be our husband's helper (Gen 1:26-31: 1Cor. 11:8-9)"

Comment Question
Where do you find yourself in this chapter: Are you a full-time homemaker, or are you employed outside of the home? Regardless of your situation, how did this chapter challenge you attitude toward your home?

Week 7~ The Reward of Kindness

He can heal us of Anger, Bitterness, and Judging in our lives.

pg 119
"Kindness" he says, "is the sincere desire for the happiness of others," and "goodness is the activity calculated to advance that happiness"

pg 120
"So let's cease straining in our own power and turn to our Helper. Let's ask him for the strength and ability to demonstrate kindness and goodness. Our vigorous effort is still required, but it is only effective in cooperation with the Holy Spirit."

This is just one more reminder to me that I need to have a quiet time everyday and release any daily struggles I have to my Helper. When looking back I am at my best when I am in the word daily and striving for the goodness to create the happiness that he has for me and my family.

Ephesians 4:31-32 "Let all bitterness .... be put away from you... Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you"

pg 128
"goodness begins at home.... Our husbands and children should be the primary beneficiaries of our good works."

We should also focus on our husband and children in our prayer life. When I do this I find that it helps with my focus to come off of activities and situations and more on them as people that God has trusted me to take care of.

pg 133
"..if you devote your life to your family's happiness, the rewards will far exceed the sacrifices."

God gives us the strength to do the job he has before us. He is watching and does care about all the tiny details. I praise him for calling me his and loving me this much!

Comment Question
Are you currently experiencing weariness of doing good for your family? How do the promised rewards provide fresh incentive to pursue your husband's and children's happiness?

Week 8 ~ The Beauty of Submission

He will give us the inner strength to submit to our husbands~

pg 136
"She was struck by the peace and the joy that this submission produced, and she was amazed by the way these women talked about their husbands-always with honor and respect. This attitude was in stark contrast to that of her other friends, who relished their men bashing sessions."

This was a great reminder to apply the earlier chapters in my daily conversations with others. It is so easy to get wrapped up in these type of discussions that are really not glorifying to anyone. After all is said it is done.

pg 140
"we see that the submissive wife-far from being the weak-willed woman our culture portrays-is actually a model of inner strength."

pg 145
"instead of a list of chores waiting for him, he didn't have anything to do. I found alot of joy in taking care of the house and not burdening him with additional responsibilities."

This is a hard one to swallow on some days. Over the past year Chris will call me when he is almost home and that is my cue for the "clean sweep". I have a drawer that everything goes into and then I will deal with that in the morning once he leaves if I had not had time to clean and organize before he gets home. He loves not having to look down to see if he is going to fall on a car. Also that he can find a seat that is not covered with clothes.

pg 147
"Our submissive conduct actually provokes our husbands to be the leaders God intends for them to be"

Comment Questions
If submission includes helping our husbands to lead, what is one way you can use your gifts to assist your husband this week?

Week 9 ~ Margaret's Story

pg 157
"in God's eyes she has achieved true greatness. Her life can be summed up by the words of our Lord: "Whoever would be great among you must be your servant...even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."

What is the goal of our story of being a mom and a wife? Who are we serving in all that we do. This book has been such a blessing to me and my sisters in Christ. We pray that you will find some points to jot down and keep somewhere so you can remember who you are serving in the journey on motherhood.

Please feel free to share this with a couple of friends that may be able to use this study as a community of sisters that can get together over the internet when we have time to rest in our Lord.

Serving Him~
Imogene

Welcome to Online Studies!

We are so excited to bring the Daniel Study from Beth Moore right to you through this blog. We are going to be providing the links to her videos for you to watch each week along with a blog post and comments from other sisters who will be going along this journey with us over the next 10 weeks.

Participation Requirements ~
Follow this blog by hitting the follow button on the right hand side of this blog.

You will need to purchase your activity book through Central or online and have it ready for January 19, 2011.

You will have the option of watching the videos any Wednesday morning at Central at our study which will start at 9:30. We will have additional videos available for check out for 24 hour time frames. You will also be provided with an audio and video link for your use. Between these four options we know you will find the best one to fit your needs.

We are looking to you to comment on this blog each week to really get involved in this study and see what our Lord has for you! We want him to reach you where you are and help you feel the body of Christ which he designed to help you through this journey of being a mother.